Do You Play the Blame Game?

When things go wrong, who’s to blame?

Marriages go stale for all sorts of reasons but sometimes we focus on the effect rather than the cause. An affair, for example is rarely the cause of a marital break up, it can however, be the last straw.

Cause and Effect

When relationships fail it is usually due to a build up of issues that have gradually weighed down the marriage. It’s very easy to place the blame on your partner but often, after a lot of soul searching, couples can see that each has a part to play in a disintegrating romance. It’s back to cause and effect – one set of behaviors or attitudes prompts your partner to act in a certain way.

Identify and Address Issues

Untangling marital problems is an important factor in resolving differences however it is unhealthy and unhelpful to play the blame game. Better to identify issues and look to address them.

You may ask yourself the following questions:

-       Why did my marriage become so dull?

-       When did he/she start to nag so much?

-       Why does he/she spend so much time on x rather than y?

-       When did we last have a good talk?

-       Why is he/she so disinterested in me?

The honeymoon may be over and you may both have got caught up in life and the day-to-day responsibilities you both have within and outside of the marriage. However, every day doesn’t need to be full of romance and excitement, it should however, be full of caring, sharing support.

Lead the Way

It also has to be said that breaking a cycle of boredom or indifference doesn’t happen without real change and effort. If you are the one who is restless and wants change, it may be up to you to take action to turn things around.

The basics of any marriage involve communication, respect and compromise. If you can incorporate these three basic rules into the way you treat each other then the future bodes well for you both. It’s not easy to turn things around though, and you may need help to save your marriage today. Why not check out this great resource that has already helped thousands of couples across the globe. It comes tried and tested and has worked its magic on thousands of struggling relationships.

So forget who’s to blame and focus on instilling good qualities in your marriage, starting with demonstrating good, positive traits yourself. Even if your partner is entrenched in bad habits, take the bull by the horns and lead the way.